Of course, it all starts in childhood. I was a very stubborn and opiniated child. This was a problem for my mom. Firstly, in Soviet Union, people were simply not allowed to think differently. No wonder, that my mom inherinted this fear like many other in the country. Secondly, she wanted to have authority, thus, thinking differently than her was not allowed also.
As follows, I was forced to become a sweet person, who is nice to everyone no matter what. Clearly, this unnecessary niceness has caused me many problems in adulthood, such as being taken for granted, lack of respect, and attention from creepy men. No, things are not that dramatic, my life has been full of many interesting and pleasant moments. At the same time, my life would have been way better by now, if I had sharp personal borders and strong opinions.
I can’t travel to the past, but I can take the responsibility for my future. I am in the process of setting personal borders, saying sharply ‘no’, focusing on important for me things, changing the circle of people I communicate with. It takes time, but it’s totally worth it. This is the question of my well-being and happiness.
Take care of yourself. Remember to say ‘no’, if you feel like it. Don’t waste your precious time on people, who will not give you a hand when you need it. Don’t go for a tea or coffee with someone just to kill loneliness. Stay home, go to a gym, clean, read a book instead. Do something for your beloved self. Being a b#tch is horrible, having healthy egoism is great. ❤️